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Cake or Death: 2013 Year-End Man-by-man Assessment of D.C. United's Roster
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December 16, 2013
Cake or Death? The results.
Well, sports fans, you voted, you debated and you waited for results. The counts are in, and here is how the Black and Red United community feels about each player and coach from the 2013 edition of D.C. United.
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December 13, 2013
Cake or Death? Ending the series w/ Dave Kasper
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. We end our series with GM Dave Kasper.
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December 12, 2013
Cake or Death? Big day: Ben Olsen
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today we look at the man in charge, Ben Olsen.
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December 11, 2013
Cake or Death? Top assistant coach Chad Ashton
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today we ask whether Chad Ashton should return.
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December 10, 2013
Cake or Death? Departed assistant coach Josh Wolff
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today's subject is departed assistant Josh Wolff.
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December 9, 2013
Cake or Death? Goaleepers coach Preston Burpo
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. This week we turn our attention to the coaches.
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December 5, 2013
Cake or Death? Ending the series w/ Daniel Woolard
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Our final player in the series is Daniel Woolard.
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December 4, 2013
Cake or Death? Backup GK Joe Willis's turn.
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today: backup goalkeeper Joe Willis is on tap.
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December 3, 2013
Cake or Death? Homegrown CB Ethan White
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we discuss Ethan White.
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December 2, 2013
Cake or Death? Former Terp Casey Townsend
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. We start the sixth week with Casey Townsend.
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November 29, 2013
Cake or Death? Midfield veteran John Thorrington
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. We our 5t week with John Thorrington.
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November 28, 2013
Cake or Death? Alam Syamsir/Syamsir Alam
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, the long-awaited* look at Alam Syamsir.
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November 27, 2013
Cake or Death? Midseason acquisition Luis Silva
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today we look at attacking midfielder Luis Silva.
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November 26, 2013
Cake or Death? Conor Shanosky's curious situation
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today's subject is HGP Conor Shanosky.
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November 25, 2013
Cake or Death? Teenage internat'l Michael Seaton
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and inevitably die. Week 5 starts with homegrown striker Michael Seaton.
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November 22, 2013
Cake or Death? Kaka's bestie, Marcelo Saragosa
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we look at the departed Marcelo Saragosa.
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November 21, 2013
Cake or Death? Exit El Pescadito.
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we look at the short tenure of Carlos Ruiz.
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November 20, 2013
Cake or Death? What's our take on James Riley?
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, fullback James Riley takes center stage.
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November 19, 2013
Cake or Death? Canuck international Kyle Porter
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we look at midfielder Kyle Porter.
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November 18, 2013
Cake or Death? Partyboy Edition
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we look at Chris Pontius.
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November 15, 2013
Cake or Death? Dancing on Lionard Pajoy's grave.
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, departed striker Lio Pajoy
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November 14, 2013
Cake or Death? The Sainey Nyassi Question
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we look at Gambian winger Sainey Nyassi.
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November 13, 2013
Cake or Death? LEWIS NEAL! LEWIS NEAL!
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, we yell LEWIS NEAL! a lot in the comments.
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November 12, 2013
Cake or Death? Collin Martin's turn on the stage
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. Today, our second-youngest player, Collin Martin.
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November 11, 2013
Cake or Death? Chris Korb's turn
With the 2013 season finally, mercifully behind us, it's time to run through the D.C. United roster and determine who should stay and eat cake and who should leave the team and find inevitable death. We begin week 3 with 3rd-year fullback Chris Korb.