clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Chris Rolfe cut his hair and nothing is sacred anymore

New, 13 comments

The Headband of Brothers is in turmoil.

Remember that time we had a B&RU tailgate and we all got our very own headbands? Remember when D.C. United signed an affable Finn named Markus Halsti who had beautiful blond hair and a headband to boot? Remember when Conor Doyle, in a futile attempt to tame the flop of hair atop his head, donned a headband? Remember when Nick DeLeon did, too?

Well, good. I hope you do remember those things. Because it seems that the Age of the Chris Rolfe Magic Headband has come to pass, at least for the near future.

And in case you don't believe Pablo, have it from the man himself:

It's tough to stomach, I know. I suppose we should be grateful he waited until the offseason to make this change, or else United's luck in the playoffs would surely have been worse.

Hard analysis, though: the guy was due for a change. While I supported Rolfe's unique hairstyle—which alternated between "country music singer" and "90s grunge enthusiast who recently showered and moonlights as a midwestern farmer, probably" depending on the length—I was mostly in it for the headband. The headband was, indeed, magical. The headband sparked a piece of DCU history that will live on for generations to come.

But lately, the hair had taken on a questionable length. As I remarked to my crew whilst watching the Black-and-Red fight, and ultimately fail, to stay in the playoffs against the Red Bulls:

And flared jeans have a place (maybe?), but that place isn't Chris Rolfe's head. So while I mourn the probable loss of the headband, I understand the decision to shed its reason for existing in the first place.

I can only hope that this isn't truly the end of the Original Headband. Time will tell. In the meantime, Rolfe, you look good, bro.