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Would United fans be interested in Jeff Cunningham?

Jim Rogash - Getty Images

This man is riding the Dallas bench, but has more MLS goals than anyone aside from Jaime Moreno. DC United has only 11 goals all season. Are you interested?

If you pay attention to the rest of MLS, you might have noticed that FC Dallas started their new forward Milton Rodriguez tonight, in the first game he was eligible to play. Over the past few weeks, they had been sending out Atiba Harris as their lone striker (with Honduran speedster Marvin Chavez at the right midfield spot Harris normally played). While Cunningham did enter the game at halftime, it stands to reason that at this point, Cunningham is Schellas Hyndman's third-choice forward.

So I'm mulling that over, and looking at the MLS standings, and I see our 11 goals on the season. Really, it jumps out and slaps me in the face, as it does every time I see that figure. A beer later, the two thoughts meet up inside my head, and I can't help but be curious: Is this something we should pursue?

Here are some pros and cons:

Pro: Cunningham scored 15 goals just last year, and almost all of them came after the all-star break. While he's not as fast as he once was, he'd still be our fastest striker by a wide margin. Also, Dallas might be willing to part with him, since they don't need a potentially unhappy bench player endangering what is a promising squad (they've only lost 2 games all season, after all). Despite his age, Cunningham doesn't look like he's about to retire any time soon. He's still pretty fit and he's always had deceptive physical strength for someone that's only 5'8". He's probably got two more years of good soccer left in him, and might even have three.

Con: Cunningham turns 34 next month, no matter how fit he might appear. Perhaps more alarmingly, he's been plagued by rumors of being a tough guy for coaches to deal with throughout his career. To this point, one of the only good things you can say about our players is that they've stuck together and are not falling apart as a locker room. This would probably jeopardize that bond. There's also the fact that Dallas would almost certainly bend us over the barrel on the trade. Given our recent tendency to end up losing out on trades, this would probably be another example of overpaying for someone. Finally, Onalfo clearly prefers a two-man strike force. Cunningham, meanwhile, has always played his best soccer without a partner. Reconciling these two facts would be tricky.

I'm not advocating a trade by any means, but I am at least willing to think about it (as well as other moves). I realize that playing MLS fantasy trader is a silly thing to engage in, but thinking about the team in its current state is ruining my night. Cunningham's speed and finishing ability would both be miles ahead of any of our current forwards (Pablo Hernandez may or may not be that sharp of a finisher, but he has shown that he's not particularly fast). On the other hand, the cons I've listed are all legitimate worries.

If we weren't so offensively inept, I wouldn't entertain this idea for a second. However, can beggars really afford to be picky?

Poll
Do you want DC United to pursue a trade for Jeff Cunningham?
Yes, and I'd offer them anything they want (other than Najar)
2 votes
Yes, but only if we can get him on the cheap.
16 votes
Meh. I'm only going to games at this point because I love tailgating.
0 votes
No, I think we're better off going younger.
12 votes
Hell no! Rabble rabble rabble!
6 votes

36 votes | Poll has closed

Comment 7 comments  |  0 recs  | 

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Comments

Display:

We need offense.

“GIT R DONE!”

Ski-U-Mah!

by CrazyCollegian on Jul 18, 2025 1:07 AM EDT reply actions  

He’d be a good fit for the next season or two, but hopefully not in the long term, when our younger players have developed and we’ve (hopefully) turned the team around.

A Capital Wasteland - Blogging about you behind your back.

by Jake Shapiro on Jul 18, 2025 9:26 AM EDT reply actions  

Voted no

I’m just afraid he’d be another Emilio. A striker that’s just a year or two out from being a prolific goalscorer, but has probably lost his touch. There’s got to be a reason he’s on the bench for Dallas, and they’ve been doing well without him.

We need goals. There’s no doubt about that. But I don’t know if endangering our team chemistry is worth it considering that this season has already been lost. We might be better off spending more time scouting potential #3 overall draft picks right now than considering trades for 34-year olds.

The only reason I would be in favor of trading for Cunningham would be if our plan was to park his butt on the bench for the rest of his career so he would have no chance of catching Moreno’s all-time scoring record.

Managing Editor for BlackAndRedUnited.com. Weekend Writer for SBNation DC.

by Martin Shatzer on Jul 18, 2025 11:22 AM EDT reply actions  

I voted hell no! rabble rabble rabble, cause frankly, that was funny.

by DonCaps819 on Jul 18, 2025 11:36 AM EDT reply actions  

Hell No!

Cunningham can score in bunches when motivated, but that motivation only lasts for a few weeks. Sounds a lot like a certain Brazilian that we just showed the door.
And, unlike Emilio, when he is not motivated, he is a drain on the team and a disruptive force in the locker room.

by BrunoReturns on Jul 18, 2025 5:41 PM EDT reply actions  

I'm selfishly inclined to sign him and keep him benched

No touching Jaime’s scoring record, Cunningham!

by Brendanukkah on Jul 19, 2025 12:14 AM EDT reply actions  

What about Richie Cunningham?

We could probably get Potsie, Ralph Malph and the Fonz, too for less money and just as much production.

by dc army on Jul 20, 2025 7:41 PM EDT via mobile reply actions  

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