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It’s Actually United Day! Friday Freedom Kicks

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I challenge any other morning link dump to match today’s hat trick: a golazo, a howler, and a 5v2 nutmeg.

Colorado Rapids v DC United Photo by Patrick McDermott/Getty Images

Happy United Day, fam! D.C. United will be playing Major League Soccer soccer tonight in the Buckeye State. Jason will have you covered with a preview of that game at FC Cincinnati later today, so keep your eyes peeled.

In the meantime, know that Pipa Higuain is ready.

What D.C. United players need to step up, plus Jeff Rueter from The Athletic | B&RU

I’ll start you off with some self-promotion for the latest episode of Filibuster. We talked about the pronunciation of Staunton, Va., and Bowie, Md., and Versailles, Ky., and we discussed the long list of players who will need to step up for the Black-and-Red to avoid a repeat of the poor showing in Orlando. We also spent some time with Jeff Rueter to preview los Capitalinos’ trip to the land of pasta sauce pretending to be chili.

March to Matchday – The Filibuster Podcast’s Adam Taylor | Cincinnati Soccer Talk

One good plug deserves another. Listen to yours truly giving the D.C. skinny to some FCC fans.

How the Sounders’ deal with Amazon could have league-wide impact | The Athletic

I’m on the record as saying teevee money is the single biggest thing that will determine the future course of our league. Jeff Bezos has himself a lot of money, and Amazon is getting into the MLS TV game. With CBS jumping with both feet into the soccer streaming warz with NWSL and the European Champions Leagues, the jostling for the post-2022 MLS carriage deal is getting interesting, even as ratings have remained stagnant.

I Now Know What I’m Calling the Orlando City-Inter Miami Series | The Mane Land

I’m really happy for all the people in Florida who will get to use those Ben Stiller and RDJ reaction gifs <3 <3 <3

Exclusive: Frank de Boer on his Atlanta United departure and what’s next | The Athletic

This piece starts with Frank de Boer saying he didn’t think he’d lost the ATL UTD locker room when he was unceremoniously fired mutually agreed to split ways with the club. And then every other paragraph begins by naming a, usually high-profile, player with whom he had a garbage relationship. Big thinking face emoji energy there.

I’ll leave you with last night’s laser-rocket-bullet-lightning goal from Darlington Nagbe, who’s good for something obscene like this every so often.

Actually, no, I lied. I’m going out with this bit of work from a goalkeeper who is somehow (???!!!) ahead of Bill Hamid on Gregg Berhalter’s depth chart. AND YES, Sean Johnson, I am extra mad that you did this to gift points to the Red Bulls of all teams.

In conclusion, MLS is a land of contrasts.