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I can’t.

MLS: Orlando City SC at D.C. United Geoff Burke-USA TODAY Sports

Salisbury United set the pace this week, with 104 points.

I, too, captained Zlatan Ibrahimovic (LA, $11.5). There’s no real standout score here, but a lot of solid scores that added up.

Positional Leaders

Goalkee —


So I’ve been living in Europe for nearly 16 months now, and even in the worst of times I’ve been watching D.C. United games at all hours of the early morning. 2am kickoff? Down some espresso and stay up. 4:30am kickoff? Go to bed early, wake up for kickoff. That was the case from May of 2017 through June of 2018. I went home for the Audi Field opener because I couldn’t stand to miss it.

But see, I started working full time in early July. I told my wife that I was sad because I couldn’t watch the United match against Orlando because it was technically on Monday morning, and I had to be up for work five hours after it kicked off. I set FotMob to notify me of the score so I’d see it first thing when I woke up. When I saw that D.C. had won 3-2, I was pleased, especially because I’d predicted that score. I went into the match summary and saw the late, late winner, and then I scrambled to my computer to see the highlights. It was upon watching them that I missed being home for D.C. United matches the most. Don’t get me wrong: I love living where we’re living and I don’t ever second guess the decision to do it, but I love this damn team and I’d give a lot to have been there on Sunday night.

I don’t know if this team will make the playoffs, and to be honest I don’t really care right now. That was one of the best moments in club history. New stadium, fans reunited, and a win at the death when we absolutely had to have it, it’s magical. Enjoy the ride. I’ll be there with you whenever I can.

Looking Ahead

A few teams play twice this week — LA, the Galaxy, Colorado, D.C., Portland, and RSL. I’m going with a heavily Los Angeles lineup, as LA has RSL and Colorado at home, and the Galaxy is home for Colorado and away to Seattle. In goal, go with Tyler Miller (LA, $6.0), and in defense save some money with Jorgen Skjelvik (LAG, $4.8). Play the tallest man on Earth, Luciano Acosta (DCU, $9.0) with home matches against Portland and New England, and Carlos Vela (LA, $10.3) is your man at forward.