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Freedom Kicks: Washington Spirit, USMNT, and other soccer links for Monday August 31st, 2015

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Freedom Kicks needed a sub today, but the managing editors failed to figure out who would do it. As a result, you're getting this scrambled, low-grade effort.

In my Football Manager game last night, I found a Belarussian player in the Eredivisie named simply "Zmushko." I'm scouting him in the hopes that he's good enough to play in Serie A because I like to imagine he would exclusively refer to himself in the third person. "Zmushko wants more playing time, or Zmushko will have to put in a transfer request."

Anyway, I thought it was funny last night, and I needed a laugh after last night's game. I'm actively avoiding the topic, in fact, so here are your D.C. United free links, 2+ hours late:

Match Recap: Portland Thorns FC 3, Washington Spirit 3 | Stumptown Footy
If you left your TV on FS1 after the game I just said I didn't want to talk about, you got to see a more enjoyable NWSL game. Crystal Dunn was once again amazing, assisting on the first goal by drawing a crowd before dishing to Francisca Ordega and then scoring on a header - she's 5'1", by the way - just before halftime to give the Washington Spirit a 2-0 lead.

The Thorns came out flying for the 2nd half, with a spell of pressure ending with Alex Morgan chipping a shot over the onrushing Ashlyn Harris in the 53rd minute. Tobin Heath then won and converted a penalty in the 70th before Jodie Taylor appeared to cap off a furious rally by scoring Portland's third in the 80th. However, Dunn scored virtually straight from the kickoff to pull the Spirit back even at 3-3. Stoppage time featured good opportunities for both sides, with Taylor missing two half-chances inside the penalty area.

With the draw, the Spirit are in 3rd place with all 4 playoff teams down to their last game. If the Spirit beat the Seattle Reign on September 5th at the Soccerplex, then they could move up to 2nd - and get a home playoff game as a result - if the Chicago Red Stars fail to beat the Houston Dash on the 6th (the Spirit have the tiebreaker on Chicago). They could also still fall to 4th depending on what FC Kansas City does, which would mean a 2nd straight playoff trip out to Seattle to face the runaway regular season champs. It sounds tough, but you can hardly bet against any team with Dunn at this point.

Jurgen Klinsmann names USMNT roster for Peru and Brazil friendlies | Stars and Stripes FC
I need a laugh and a drink to deal with the national team these days. Yarbrough, Alvarado, Orozco, Diskerud, and Morales are all wrong selections. This is going to be an ugly Monday.

Υπογράφει στη Νιου Γιορκ Κόσμος ο Σαμαράς! | Gazzetta.gr
Current Greek international Georgios Samaras may be on the verge of signing with the New York Cosmos. Unlike the other big signings for the Cosmos, he's only 30. On the other hand, his talents have been rotting in Scotland for years due to only getting to play 6-7 actual competitive matches a season.

Did Sounders fans rip off Revolution fans? | The Bent Musket
Knowingly? Maybe, maybe not. But yeah, it's the same tifo.

So, in the words of Andre 3000, that's as far as I got. If you have interesting links, please pad this out in the comments.