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DC United's Rebirth Predictions (Cont.)

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  1. 2015- Pontuis loaned to Sunderland. Sits on bench the whole season. United move into Baltimore. Makes playoffs.
  2. 2016- Yallop becomes Union's coach. Jaime Moreno becomes head coach. Leads team to MLS Cup. Bill Hamid is the MLS Cup MVP

DC United's Rebirth Predictions

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  1. 2010- Ben Olsen becomes United's interim head coach
  2. 2011- Sven Eriksson becomes head coach. Doesn't make playoffs. Gets fired. Kasper wonders why he hasn't been fired and mugged yet.
  3. 2012- Jaime Moreno retires. Frank Yallop becomes head coach. DC barely gets into playoffs.
  4. 2013- Announced plans to move United to Baltimore. United barely makes playoffs.
  5. 2014- Captain Chris Pontuis leads team to Eastern Conference Finals, but lose to the Revolution. Moreno begs to become head coach. Namoff is still injured from his concussion but refuses to retire. Still Baltimore bound.

Who I think should be United's DP:

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  1. Antonio Floro Flores: Deadly Italian striker with a name that literally translates to Anthony Bloom Flowers.
  2. Michael Brown - Portsmouth F.C. is dying and Brown is gonna need a new home.
  3. Thierre Henry - I refuse to just let him go to NY
  4. Wayne Rooney - when you wish upon a star...
  5. Freddy Adu - His career could use a recharge.
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